Letter to a Self-Employed Friend Recovering from Burnout

Having a full-time job while starting your own business online can be a recipe for serious burnout. 

You are not alone.  Many of us self-employed service professionals have experienced similar burnouts trying to keep the service business running while also creating new ventures. I know I have.

I was out of commission for 3-4 months during the spring/summer of 2008 with profound exhaustion and fatigue combined with related liver and thyroid health issues.  It was a big wake up call for me...and the inspiration for me to transform my business.  

I was trying to to do it all; Run a service business, teaching business, and write books, develop products and workshops all at the same time, not to mention blogging.  

The words Prioritize and Focus took on a whole new meaning for me when I realized that in order to "design a life and a business that fits my authentic self" I had to take a deep inventory of all the things I love to do, and weigh them against what was best for my whole life.  

It was so incredibly painful to decide that I had to let go of most of my "one-on-one" work with people - at least for a year.  But it became painfully clear that it was the only way I could make my life work AND make the time to create and deliver the group coaching program and the self-study learning programs I've been dreaming of creating for many years.  I'm had to accept and embrace that as a creative personality type (ENTP) and a person with ADD (ADHD) I had unique needs. 

Other people can do it all at once, but I had to accept that I'm not wired that way.  I can't work for one hour a day on 8 different projects.  I "need" to hyperfocus on one at a time.  A day full of attention shifts is just too stressful - a recipe for burnout.  It reminded me of why I left upper management.  I so missed the feeling of becoming completely absorbed in creative projects and then having a product to show for it. Something tangible that could help many people. Consulting to a variety of industries "fit" me so much better than managing a department within a corporation myself. 

I'm a natural born "pattern seer", I see patterns in everything, make connections and design solutions to problems that take many many variables into account.  I see so many patterns in my work with clients, it has helped see my own patterns more clearly.  My clients had so many similar problems, I was constantly feeling like I wanted to connect them so that they would know they weren't alone and so that I didn't have to repeat myself so often! 

Working with people in groups became even more compelling when I experienced the dramatic successes people had in a group setting.  Sometimes way faster than the progress they made one-on-one.  I think people who are chronically disorganized tend to become isolated and stuck in their problems.  The energy they get from the group is so healing and powerful.   So my vision for my life is to focus in the power of the group (as I think about it now, my corporate work was very focused on the power of the team. ironic huh?)    

Anyway I couldn't just abandon my current clients so I had to transition gradually.  Living in transition is sometimes almost harder than staying the same. It's a slow goodbye to one life while the other awaits you. You envision it, can see it and taste it, but you are still not completely done with the other life. You have to hold your compelling purpose and remind yourself of it constantly. It's so hard to focus when you enjoy many things, and also need to make a living too. You can't just quit the "fountain that pays the bills."  And client work pays the bills so much more easily than "developing" and "creating" your own stuff does.  But I've invested in myself before, and I figured out how to do it again.  It requires rethinking everything about your cost structure and cash flow. But I digress : ) 

You are in the midst of a very deep life shift....please know that you are not alone...and that is OK to take the time you need to discover yourself, prioritize, and design your new business to fit YOU and your needs.  No matter how unconventional they are. Listen to what other's have learned on their journey but always listen to your own inner guidance in making choices that feel right for who you are. 

Remember that everyone out there telling you how to succeed using "their systems"  created their own system too. Not everyone has it in their DNA to follow other's advice successfully.  And the "learning" curve / costs on some paths may not be worth it for you.  That's okay too. 

People tell me I should hire others to write my books for me, etc.  If all I cared about was making money that would be certainly be the best way to go, but it doesn't fit me and my sense of self. Or maybe I haven't found the right person who can write for me and still make it feel like mine.  : ) 

The point is that it's okay to slow down and take the time you need to evolve your life to fit your vision as well as the "reality" of who you are.  

I wish you all the best in your journey.

TOPICS IN THIS POST

prioritize, focus, service professionals, self-employed, recovering from burnout, exhaustion, 

fatigue, compelling purpose, discovering your authentic self, making life work, making time for yourself, 

creative personality, ADD, ADHD, accepting and embracing who you are, ENTP, hyperfocus, 

attention shifting, seeing patterns, the power of the group, business cost structure,